Technical literacy is the Road Runner
Unfortunately, we’re Acme and all our end users are coyotes.
Me: Okay, I want you to unplug power from your modem.
User: You mean the Ethernet cable?
Me: No, the power.
User: Look, I don’t know all your technical terms!
St. Bob's Basilica 
Please, please say you’re kidding.
She did not say this?
She said this. I couldn’t make this up if I tried.
Of course. Blame you.
What really hurts is that there is no possible way to answer that without making the user feel like I’m making fun of their stupidity. And of course, that would be frowned upon if I were getting QA’d.
I’ve found that if you preface it with “I’m sorry”, you can get away with a lot.
“I’m sorry, I mean the electrical power.”
It ends up sounding like “you’re right, there are two or more different types of “power” on a modem, and I forgot to specify”. It more roughly translates as “just to mollify you, I’ll pretend that there was some ambiguity”.
The hard part is when they say “Ooooh. Why didn’t you say so?” because that’s when your super-secret powers of not strangulating morons must be at its peak.
(I know, “strangling”. But tell me strangulating doesn’t have more panache (pronounced “pah na chee”).)
No, there was no way I was throwing even the smallest bone to someone that stupid. The only consideration I got was that I wasn’t going to rub it in.
Shouldn’t that be “nibbled to death by cats”? :)
The IQ of the average user must drop precipitously after midnight.
Being nibbled to death by ducks would take longer and probably be more like Chinese water torture. Cats at least have teeth and the job would get done with some efficiency…